Today I’m remembering and holding close in my heart the friend and loved one . . .
. . . who doesn’t know how she’s going to raise her child(ren) because she can’t make ends meet after leaving her abuser to save their lives. I pray that good-hearted others will want to help.
. . . whose child(ren) chose to abandon her along with her church when she left the man who was stealing her life from her. I pray that as they grow older and wiser, they will see the light.
. . . who appears childless to the outside world, but the outside world doesn’t know how many children she has in heaven.
. . . who is struggling with the effects of a mental illness or a mental disorder caused by abuse.
. . . who can find almost no one to talk to about her situation because the ones who hear just a little bit recoil in horror.
. . . who is trying not to think too much about the years ahead as she focuses on today in raising her little one(s).
. . . who was disbelieved by everyone or almost everyone in her life and feels abandoned and alone, perhaps with one or two of her younger ones still with her. I pray she will find other strong connections among those who understand.
. . . who left her children’s abuser to get them safe and now finds that she has to share joint unsupervised custody with him.
. . . who is dealing with the effects of abuse in the lives of her children.
. . . who would have made a wonderful mother but never had the opportunity.
. . . whose child was killed in the prime of life, even possibly at his or her own hand.
. . . who is still struggling to remain in a nightmare of a marriage and keep her child(ren) safe from the harm.
. . . who lost a child (or maybe more than one) who decided to follow in the path of their abuser.
. . . who truly loves his or her narcissist mother but knows if he reaches out to her, his hand will be bitten off.
. . . whose mother didn’t believe you when you told her someone she respected was hurting you.
. . . whose mother was too broken or ignorant or even evil to protect them from the predator they had to face on a regular basis (who may have been the mother herself).
. . . who mourns his deceased mother and the relationship that can now never be mended this side of heaven.
For some, Mother’s Day is a very hard day. And so I’m thinking about you, and I’m praying you’ll feel the presence of the Lord near you in your pain. I’m sending much love your way.
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Go here to download your free Guide, How to Enjoy the Bible Again (when you’re ready) After Spiritual Abuse (without feeling guilty or getting triggered out of your mind). You’ll receive access to both print and audio versions of the Guide (audio read by me). I’m praying it will be helpful.
This is precious..
Thank you
Thank you ♥️
Thank you Rebecca!
who made an adoption plan,and to those who did not, but by circumstances could not parent their children. You are not forgotten.
Yes, thank you, Lisa.
Thank you.
Thank you. I was struggling this morning for many of the reasons you have listed. Your words of compassion are a healing balm to my hurting heart.
I am the daughter of a “Christian” narcissistic mother who is a better actress in public than I will ever be.
I’m so sorry.
Thank you for the words of encouragement. I actually dislike this day for many reasons, mostly because it was all a facade. Sigh…
Yes, for so many. May the peace of Christ be with you today.
Thank you. I am also thinking of many women, who have prayed and hoped to have children of their own for their whole adult life, but have been rejected by the men they met and never were considered ‘good’ enough to marry. The church often disregards our pain and belittles that loss, telling women like us that we just need to be content and think of all the ‘other stuff’ available to us as singles. (But what often happens, when we do try to get involved with ministry, we are considered as ‘immature’ and not adult enough, since we don’t have children of our own… )
The society often views us like the selfish ones, who just want to enjoy life and not settle down…
But many of us are grieving. although not in public – there are no graves to cry on, no memories to hold to, and no future reunion with babies in Heaven. (mothers of dead children at least have that hope ..)
It is no wonder that even some Christian women resort to getting pregnant out of wedlock just to experience the joy of motherhood – even though that is hard and often lonely. At least society and churches generously support those women and sees them as valuable human beings..
I wish this topic was less taboo and more openly discussed in churches, not with the assumption that ‘women have themselves to blame since they are no longer feminine enough’ or other such absurd explanations, but with compassion and honesty.
Thank you for this heartfelt comment, NGI. This topic does need to be addressed with compassion and honesty, and I hope more people will be doing it.
Thank you for this!! It can be a difficult and annoying holiday to recognize as a daughter of a supposed Christian, narcisstic mother who refused to protect her own children.
I’m so sad about this, Jessica. I’m so sorry.
Thank you for this post. It has been a very painful day. I was so blessed to have the Lord give me the gifts of three children … a fourth is with the Lord. But oh Lord, to have the man who fathered them and to have them all snub me is truly painful.
That is so extremely painful, and I ache with you.
Thank you for acknowledging all of the hurting, wounded and left-out mothers and daughters. There are so many in these situations, and Mothers Day can feel like a cold slap, a painful reminder that something is terribly broken. Knowing that we are not alone is very comforting.
Thank you. So much of this resonates with me. Especially the part about mental illness stealing motherhood from a person, or moms who lost their kids due to drug addiction/mental illness.
I’m also thinking of moms who leave their abusers. I always blamed my mom for what happened with my dad. Now, I’m able to see the bigger picture.
Thinking, too, of some friends of mine who have physical illnesses which prevent them from being moms.
Yes, moms who leave their abusers and lost their children are in there. Yes, so much this about physical illness too.
To those who became a mother to her siblings when she was far to young, because her parents were absent at best and only caused pain when they gave her and her siblings any attention?
I’m not quite sure if she belongs here, but she is exhausted
She does. I actually do know several of her. She is a valuable and precious soul.
Thank you! Mother’s Day has mixed emotions for many reasons, childhood and current. Today I am choosing just to enjoy a few of the little things that are good.
That’s a good choice. God bless you, Ann.
This is so beautiful, Rebecca! Thank you.
Thank you so much, Rebecca, for holding space for many of us who are still walking in deep pain from all aspects of abuse. I’m so grateful we can find rays of hope at times when we find others that “get it”and acknowledge the courage and faith it is taking to forge a path forward. For each one of us…God please hold us close!
Yes, amen, thank you Colleen.